The most difficult aspect of the NDE wasn’t the experience. It wasn’t even what I saw. It was having to explain it later.
Paralyzed from the bleeding in my brain, I wasn’t able to speak for quite some time. When I was? One of the very first things out of my mouth was, “I saw God and Aunt Janice.”
At that point it was about pokes and prods and cold fingers taking my pulse, cold metal on my chest to listen to my heart, cold beeps to track the beat that had stopped after 3 days in Intensive Care. Eventually, however…
- What was it like?
- What did you see?
- What was she wearing?
On an on the questions came and the more details certain people wanted, the more difficult it became to explain.
Fortunately, my parents, my neurosurgeon, and the British surgeon who helped me on the path to holistic medicine as a lifestyle all accepted everything without further grilling or implying I wasn’t getting it right somehow.
Because it didn’t fit in with their vision of what it should be like.
We’re Still With You. As I’ve mentioned before, once the door was opened, it never shut again. Some of the Celestial beings I’d been with continued to visit with me.
Including God, who’d told me He would always be with me.
Celestial Babysitter. I clearly remember the night I was discharged from the hospital. The neurosurgeon came in to see how I was doing. It was one of the few times I was “alone” in my room.
It was about eight in the evening. My parents, getting a much needed break, were off having dinner.
I beamed up at him and said, “You just missed God. He was just here with me.”
I pointed to a place over my right shoulder.
I can still remember the look on his face as he looked at the space then back at me. I smiled and told him I had a surprise for him.
To that point I had been paralyzed on my left side. I had him put his hand in my left hand and I squeezed his fingers. Then I had him push the blankets back and showed him I could flex some of the muscles in my left leg. My reward? I could go home.
I was released at around eleven that night.
For some reason a nurse handed my mother a pillow case filled with the hair they’d shaved from my head during emergency surgery three weeks earlier. It was splattered with blood. The nurse told her, “It was for the funeral home.” Did she expect it to be a souvenir or something?
When I got home, after playing with the kittens our kitty had had, I immediately began telling my brother all about the Celestial beings that were all around me.
I think I talked him to sleep.
When my dad came in and told me to go to sleep, probably around three am, I responded by telling him about the Celestial beings that had come home with me.
The first of many late-night existential discussions.
Celestial Beings Explain. The years immediately after the surgery were chaotic. By tenth grade, things had settled down somewhat. Enough that the Celestial Beings began facilitating explanations for what I saw and experienced.
Kicking off with the rather dramatic experience in geometry class I write about.
Celestial Beings Knock. As I’ve spoken about in the video regarding how Metatron’s Army came to be, the Celestial Beings (or at least a representative) approached and told me to put it down.
It was a daunting task as it encompassed thirty-five plus years worth of work, but as I point out in the video about how Metatron’s Army got its name, I’ve had Celestial assistance when I’ve asked.
Haven’t I Seen This? Beginning with the middle game of the series, I became aware that I was no longer writing. I was read remembering.
I can still remember the exact day I stopped typing and stared at what I’d just written and said, “I remember this!”
The story – what was about to be written – it was like a déjà vu. But why?
Was I remembering the original story or what I’d seen in the NDE?
Celestial Beings Reboot. I’ve come to see they don’t necessarily wait til I ask for help to put in an appearance.
Back in the spring of tenth grade, a female Celestial being put in an appearance to explain, in detail, why the plot I was developing had to adjust to accommodate “what happened.” I was very upset because it wasn’t – I wasn’t particularly thrilled with what happened to a character, thereby affecting the other characters. She took an entire afternoon to immerse me in the explanation, going so far as to replay certain aspects of the NDE. It was like watching a movie and being able to question the one showing me while I was watching.
Years later, an accomplished writer, I was integrating those “movies” with what it takes to write a saga.
What plot would support the story? What characters would support the original eight? What universe needed to be built around the original three worlds? What backstory needed to support all of it?
I truncated a major event to fit the story.
Yes, it has elements of the real but there has to be the surround to have it translate, make it enjoyable/entertaining.
Not So Fast. One evening I got a visit from the female Celestial being.
Hadn’t seen or heard from her in years.
She wasn’t particularly happy with what I’d done to “her scene.”
She proceeded to remind me of that “conversation” we’d had all those years ago, replete with the movie.
As I watched the movie I saw the potential in putting the details back into the book. Excited, I thanked her for reminding me, then set about putting it back together.
I now see it’s the only way to do it justice.
As I’m working through the final edits of the middle game, I find myself excited because unlike the lead-in to this point, I can now focus on character insight.
I can really bring the Celestial beings to life.
There is a lightness of being to writing this part of the book. It’s natural because it exists.
As opposed to being created to support the real.
And yet it’s all untouchable because while we coexist with the Celestial, there is a divide.
It’s called awareness. Or lack of.
Back to the Beginning. It’s a beautiful marriage of the real and the imagination supported by the underlying foundation of it all.
That would be love.